Blog Reflection

Over the course of this year, I think I have become a much better writer due to blogging. Reflecting on books repetitively and with mostly the same guidelines helped me really develop my writing organization. I also got into the habit of the posts and was able to do them with more ease and use my synthesis page to develop it further. I also feel very accomplished because of the list of almost every book I read from school being in one place. 

I do think that writing online is different than writing in a notebook because I feel like it needs to be formal since it can and will be accessed more often. I also follow requirements in stricter ways and put more effort into it than I would a notebook. However, the downside to that is that I get distracted more easily- in a notebook, I would sit down and write the entire thing quickly to get it over with, in one sitting. However online, I take breaks to do other things and don’t focus as well. 

The fact that my writing is published online doesn't make a difference in my subject matter because of the security and precautions it has.Because the blog is for school, I project aspects of myself I would want my teachers and peers to see in a school setting, and if it wasn't for school, I would project different aspects of myself. However, I do take into account that it is online and can be viewed. I also think that people often view what they write online as very removed from what they would say face to face with someone. Social networking and other media often are interpreted as completely anonymous and open to any and all commentary, like whatever happens online is only online and never spoken of again, which is completely untrue. This can hurt people and just give more personal information than I think is necessary and creates entirely different relationships than there would be without social media. I think that these blogs are very different than the rest of social media because of the specific due dates and regulations, nothing gets out of hand and it all stays organized and easy to use. 

I think I may continue to add books to my list, but although the posts taught me a lot and improved my writing, they would feel kind of pointless to continue. However, if I was to continue this blog it would most likely be a more relaxed and un-objective view of the books I read. 

The Virgin Suicides by Jeffrey Eugenides (philosophical view)

In The Virgin Suicides by Jeffrey Eugenides, through the five young girls' suicides, the complexity of depression and the hardships of growing up are conveyed. The story is told through the lens of the neighborhood boys, in love with the Lisbon sisters. Eugenides not only covers the ethics of suicide, but also those of parenting, depression, freedom, and cultural influence. However, the main question I asked when reading the book was why the idea of suicide is so disturbing and tragic.

What makes the suicides of the Lisbon girls so incredibly tragic is their age, their innocence, and their purity- at least this seems to be implied by the author. Eugenides barely lets the reader empathize with the sisters before killing them off, underlining their lost potential through death. However, although the innocence through youth is apparent, I don't see how the girls have very much other lack of experience. This brings me to question what innocence is. Is virginity a form of innocence? If so, then Lux isn't innocent and the tragedy of her death is reduced. Can you still be innocent once you have receded into depression or insanity? If you can't, and all five girls were depressed, they weren't innocent either. After Cecelia, the youngest and first to kill herself, attempts suicide, in my opinion all of her sisters become less innocent, having experienced such immense grief. 

But the suicides are still tragic in my mind, even though I don't think the girls were pure. So is it suicide in itself that makes the deaths devastating? The thought of inflicting harm on your own body, against most instincts? Successful suicides could be carried out because living your life gives less satisfaction than ending it.  And if happiness for someone would mean not living, who am I to oppose suicide, or any other form of self harm which is also a form of pleasure? But the idea of suicide and self harm still seems perverse in my mind.

I knew a woman who killed herself, using the same method as two of the Lisbon girls, sleeping pills. Her husband, daughter, and son were the ones primarily affected. Suicide was an incredibly selfish act on her part, however relieving her actions were. As fictional and removed the story feels compared to this, death is jarring and irreversible and the action of inflicting permanent damage is clearly negative. But I feel like all of a sudden self harm has been popularized- particularly among teens. Even though The Virgin Suicides isn't immediately up to date, and it won't be getting any more recent as time passes, it will always be apparent; as well as an extraordinary story.